34 ways to annoy people!!
1. Leave the copy machine set to reduce 200%, extra dark, 17
inch paper, 99 copies.
2. Sit in your yard pointing a hair dryer at passing cars to see
if they slow down.
3. Specify that your drive-through order is "to go."
4. If you have a glass eye, tap on it with your pen while talking
to others.
5 . Sing along at the opera.
6. Insist on keeping your car windshield wipers running in all
weather conditions "to keep them tuned up."
7. Reply to everything someone says with "that's what YOU
think."
8 . Practice making fax and modem noises.
9. Highlight irrelevant material in scientific papers and "cc"
them to your boss
10. Make beeping noises when a large person backs up.
11. Finish all your sentences with the words "in accordance with
prophesy."
12. Signal that a conversation is over by clamping your hands
over your ears.
13. Disassemble your pen and "accidentally" flip the cartridge
across the room.
14. Holler random numbers while someone is counting.
15. Adjust the tint on your TV so that all the people are
green, and insist to others that you "like it that way."
16. Staple papers in the middle of the page.
17. Publicly investigate just how slowly you can make a
croaking noise.
18. Honk and wave to strangers.
19. Decline to be seated at a restaurant, and simply eat their
complimentary mints by the cash register.
20. TYPE ONLY IN UPPERCASE LETTERS.
21. type only in lower case letters.
22. don t use any punctuation either
23. Buy a large quantity of orange traffic cones and reroute
whole streets.
24. Repeat the following conversation a dozen times: "Do you
hear that?", "What?" "Never mind, it's gone now."
25. As much as possible, skip rather than walk.
26. Try playing the William Tell Overture (The Lone
Ranger theme) by tapping on the bottom of your chin. When
nearly done, announce, "No, wait, I messed it up," and
repeat.
27. Ask people what gender they are.
28. While making presentations, occasionally bob your head like
a parakeet.
29. In the memo field of all your checks, write "for sensual
massage."
30. Stomp on little plastic ketchup packets.
31. Go to a poetry recital and ask why each poem doesn't rhyme.
32. Ask your co-workers mysterious questions and then scribble
the answers in a notebook. Mutter something about
"psychological profiles."
33. Tell your friends 4 days prior, that you can't attend their
party because you're not in the mood.
34. Send this list to everyone in your e-mail address book even
if they sent it to you or asked you not to send things like
this.
Links
Steve Kirsch Humor Page
Steve Kirsch Home Page
Kirsch Charitable Giving Home Page
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